Debra Hyde: The Shifting World of Sexuality Writing
Posted at 6:15 PM May 23, 2008
Debra Hyde and Naked City editor Audacia Ray are both alumnae readers of the In the Flesh Reading Series, a monthly Manhattan erotica showcase where they first made each other's acquaintance. At the recent Sexerati party hosted by Tristan Taormino, Mark Michaels and Patricia Johnson, the two struck up a conversation about generation gaps and the changes wrought on sex writing by the growth of the internet. The conversation continues here on Naked City.
Audacia Ray: Last week we were talking a lot about how ideas about sexuality shift over generations. I think this is totally true, but it’s also true that there isn’t a lot of cross-generational talk about sexuality (except often in interpersonal relationships between people of different generations). There’s this sense of “reinventing the wheel” as each generation comes of age. How do you think people can be encouraged to share ideas and knowledge about sexuality across generations?
Debra Hyde: First, I'm not convinced we can escape “reinventing the wheel” -- or that it's a bad or frustrating thing. Every generation has its epiphanies – we have an entire sexual life cycle to explore in our lives -- and, if we're lucky, we'll continue to discover through our lives. I know my discoveries as a woman awaiting menopause are different but just as valuable as those I made in my twenties.
I'm not sure we should at all discount the awareness we gain from simply talking about generational lines either. My daughter's in college and I've found I learn a lot about her by simply listening without parental judgment – and that it's a joy to do so. Maybe all generations could start simply by listening, and doing so without any personal blinders in place.
I wonder just how codified we could make the exchange anyway. You and I had a pretty free-form exchange last week and I loved its flow. It remains wonderfully memorable for me. But if we were to make attempts? Especially in this on-line age?
How about a group sexblog where each contributor came of age in a different decade? Social groups for exchanging life stories? Or if there's another Sex 2.0 conference, older women will be sought out and included?
Obviously, I'm still trying to figure this out, but key to you last question, I think: We're talking here. It's enlightening and enriching. We're good at it. Let's keep it going.
Three more questions and their answers after the jump
AR:Do you think that electronic publishing –both erotica ebooks and sex blogs- has threatened the world of print erotica? Why/why not?
DH: Electronic print isn't about to overthrow the format in the same proportion that digital music overthrew the store-bought CD, but we are seeing on an going shift on several fronts.
In the 1990s, one paperback publisher, Masquerade Books, was instrumental in bringing erotic fiction and essays to book stores and chains everywhere, but late in the decade, Masquerade left the American book market. Its investors decided to go the porn site route and, if I remember correctly, soon became embroiled in felonious credit card crimes. Blue Moon Books made a legitimate effort to fill the void, but they eventually fell to a spasmodic market contraction.
Basically, the American market never returned in force. Short story anthologies were plentiful, but novels? Hardly a one to be found.
But that's because the entity migrated to the web. Early publishers like Pink Flamingo Book and Renaissance E Books led the way. At the same time, erotica crossed over into the Romance genre and then branched out into several subgenres. Now you can find erotic romance in ranging from westerns to SF/F/H. And, believe it or not, the bestselling subgenre is male/male erotic romance – basically slash fiction without the celebrity factor!
FYI: Often there's little difference between erotica and erotic romance. Don't let the labels deter you from buying and reading.
I'm not sure sex blogs are influential in the publishing shifts. Too many of them are too ephemeral – here today, gone two years from now. Of those that document actual sexual experiences, I suspect they give people an immediate voyeuristic fix and satisfy their curiosity, but I wonder if their episodic format is inherently limiting. If they affect anything in the publishing world, its the sexual memoir. Why read one whole book when you can read the latest Sugasm or Fleshbot round-up and get a whole bunch of vignettes from several viewpoints?
Last, and briefly, I don't think we'll see the big shift to electronic reading until today's dedicated readers (Amazon Kindle, Sony Reader, etc.) come down to around $100.00 per unit. I have a Sony and love it – much better for my eyes than a computer screen – but I know from talking to people that the price resistance is real.
AR: In your newest ebook, “Inequities,” you present what you call the “softer side of female dominance.” What are the ways that female dominants are stereotyped and how do you write the character against the grain?
DH: The oldest and most common perception of the dominant woman is that she's a cruel, cold-hearted ball-buster. She's a man hater. And it originated in old male-driven pornography. But it's been my experience that dominant women aren't one-size-fits all. They have as diverse in their style, tastes, and needs as anyone else in our sexual world.
What dominant women do share is a preference for being on top during erotic power exchanges and that's what I try to capture in “Inequities.” My protagonist likes to orchestrate her erotic encounters and enjoys arousing cat-and-mouse games. Cynthia exercises her erotic creativity in crafting kinky scenarios, and she cares that a mutually rewarding end is attained. And, like many of us, she's searching for intimate connection. She's no more an island than John Donne's proverbial man.
I didn't feel I was writing against the grain because I've known a number of dominant women through the years and I've witnessed their diversity first-hand. But I do feel as if I'm marketing against the grain with “Inequities.” Women readers – especially those with roots in the romance genre – will resist a novel about a dominant woman. There's still a yuck factor out there, and I can only hope that talking about it will help break down those barriers. (Not to discount male readers, but that would make this answer a couple paragraphs too long. Sorry fellas.)
AR: Over the years of being a reader and writer of erotica as well as blogger, how have your tastes changed?
DH: With blogging, I no long jump on every news item out there, trying to be the first to link to it. That's futile these days. Nor do I automatically link to the most popular things on-line; blogging's never been much of a popularity contest for me. An item either has to give me cause to think and then elaborate – or laugh so long and loud that I can't resist blogging it.
My blogging pleasures have expanded to include the light side of life (via my author blog) and all things ebooks at my ebook blog.
As a reader? Well, I've always been a pretty diverse reader. It didn't matter to me what genre a novel came from as long as it explored sex and sexuality in some context, and I've always devoured social science books about sexuality. If my interests have changed at all, they've expanded to include current events and polemics – as attested to on my Facebook page. Who knew I'd eventually explore such topics as the roots of American anti-intellectualism or the overarching presence of the Pharma industry in the treat of mental illness?
But I'm most excited about my endeavors as a writer. I'm writing in a decidedly more bisexual, polyamorous direction, truer to who I am. My next novel will be a two-part work set in a fantasy world where magic emanates from sex and sexual orientation has no prejudice attached to it. Of course, it'll have all the fixings that come with questing, but I'm most pleased with the avenues it gave me to explore.
After that, another contemporary novel about a couple's personal discoveries at a BDSM retreat, then what I hope will be an epic fantasy serial saturated with sex. Yummy!
