Sex Advice is Everywhere: Dear Prudence Gets Fetishy
Posted at 4:17 PM Jun 03, 2008
I am what you might call an obsessive reader of advice columns. I've been this way since my pre-teens when I made sure to read Ann Landers, which was syndicated in my hometown paper, every morning. Though of course I have a professional interest in sex advice, I love reading all kinds of advice - mostly because I'm nosy and I like to read about other people's problems.
The weekly "Dear Prudence" (tagline: Advice on Manners and Morals) which appears on Slate.com has been one of my weekly reads for the past few years. Though I was slightly skeptical when Emily Yoffe became the new Prudie, I've warmed to her. She's practical bordering on progressive, and she doesn't refer to herself in the third person as "Prudie" as much as her predecessor did.
This past week, I was somewhat taken aback to see the headlining question: He Wants to Be Pampered. Yes, I'm thoroughly immersed in sexuality on a daily basis, but it's still a little jolting to see the adult baby fetish addressed in a mainstream advice column. The woman who writes in says that no matter how much she tries to think otherwise, she feels totally revolted by her boyfriend's admission that he has a fetish for wearing diapers and being treated like a baby. Prudence is judicious but punny:
While there are some women who can explore the deep kinks in their partner's psyche (think of the stories about couples who stay together after the husband has undergone a sex change), you clearly are not one of them. I understand that the image of your boyfriend looking like Baby Huey is killing your libido, but remember that the man you love is not a different person; he's the same man who harbored these fantasies all along. And now that the diaper's out of the bag, you two simply can't pretend he's never mentioned his fixation. ...But since you say you can't imagine life without him, consider seeing a counselor together to at least make sure you don't come to a rash conclusion.
Nothing's wrong with a little acknowledgment that the whole adult baby thing is a little weird, and Yoffe does a good job of telling her reader that to feel squicked is ok, to cut the man out of her life without discussion is not. I love seeing this kind of infiltration of discussion about sexuality into mainstream media, it fills me with glee.
--Audacia Ray
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